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Joke of the Day

"I was passing a Chinese restaurant the other day on my way home... And thought ""when in Rome"" so I got general tso's"

"""Everyone says they're voting for Clinton or Trump, but I'm voting for Regina George because she got hit by a bus."""

"There Once Was A Poet Named Bates, His poems weren't always first rate, His first lines weren't bad, but the problem he had, Was that he always tried to put too many syllables into the last line."

"I've added Paul Walker on Xbox Live But he's always stuck on the dashboard."

"What's the best thing about fucking a transvestite? Reaching around the front and thinking, just for a second, that's it's gone all the way through"

"What's the difference between a boy scout and a Jew? Boy scouts come back from camp."

"You know how you keep an asshole in suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow!"

"Women with large breasts are generally more successful than men with large breasts."

"I tweeted about Darth Vader wearing Depends earlier. Since then, two Vaders and have ""followed"" me. I'm getting choked tonite. Help."

"Sure, the BMW symbol kind of looks like a sphincter, but I could already tell by the way you were driving."