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Joke of the Day

"""Oh, you're left handed?"" - people who see me writing with my left hand, curious if I'm just doing it for show"

"I'm such a daredevil. I put ALL my eggs in one basket at the grocery store."

"How do tiny Mexicans cut their pizza? Little Ceasars"

"Moses joke Moses was the first person to use Control+C as a shortcut."

"I cook with wine sometimes I even add it to the food."

"Unexpected things ""It says here on your resume that you're good at saying unexpected things.."" ""Yes I am"" ""But I thought you were gonna say something unexp- ..oh you're good"""

"Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the prom? A: His ghoul friend."

"Him: why doesn't anyone want me? Me: I want you. Him: why doesn't anyone else want me?"

"Did you hear that archaeologists discovered an unusual ancient Egyptian tomb recently? The body was preserved with chocolate and nuts. Experts believe it to be the tomb of Pharaoh Roche!"

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish... and he'll be fined for fishing without a license."