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Joke of the Day

"My father got crushed by a falling piano. His funeral was very low key."

Next Joke
 
"What's pink and retarded? A Flamongo."
"What do you call a dinosaur with explosive diarrhea? A shitty-sore-ass."
"MIL: You're going to give me a heart attack someday! M: Last time I checked you didn't even have a heart."
"At a live orchestra, and lightening strikes, who gets hit first? The Conductor"
"Carpenter ants are bullshit, I left a whole box of ikea furniture here, all they did was carry off my watermelon and steal a picnic basket"
"Who served as the 45th Vice President of the United States? [Warning: Gore]"
"History exam. There was no match for the history exam that Mr. Grey had set for his students. It was the Grey test of all time."
"Did you hear about that guy who had his whole left side amputated? Yeah he's all right now"
"I also like my women how I like my coffee. I don't like coffee."