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Joke of the Day
"I once had a job circumcising Elephants The pay was low, but the tips were *huge*"
Next Joke
"Parents that tell u ""it's just a little noise"" when their kid cries on a train are the same ones who knock on ur door when the music is loud"
"Longest verb What's the longest verb in the English language? Smiles. There is a mile between the first and the last letter."
"Q:What happened when Smokey the Bear started the forest fire? A: He got arrested just like you would've."
"What do you call a rabbit with fleas? Bugs Bunny"
"What do you call a priest who has had too much sacramental wine? An Alcatholic."
"What do you call someone who spends the whole time on their phone whenever you hang out? A phoney friend!"
"How to make friends with girls... Ask them to be your girlfriend."
"When my son gets uppity, I like to remind him that I'm totally nailing his mom."
"Yes officer, I did hit a pedestrian, but instead of dwelling on that why not focus on how many I've missed?"