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Joke of the Day

"A wizard is walking down the street... EDIT: Then he turns into a bar. Sorry, put this in the comment rather than the text field. Guilty as charged."

"The only thing worse than girls going after the ""Bad Boy"" is today's perception of what a Bad Boy is."

"i have 2000 karma in the sum of all my accounts and yet i feel no one respects my opinions maybe that's because i have 2500 posts"

"9/11 gave rise to ""Truthers"", Obama gave rise to ""Birthers"", so... ... would a movement to determine whether Hillary Clinton actually carries hot sauce in her purse be called ""Saucers""?"

"No one is more shocked that I brought my cat to a baseball game than my cat."

"Is trying to sell a useless set of feelings."

"Ebola You guys need to stop telling Ebola jokes. They only last about a week. (Sorry, I know Ebola is old)"

"My husband told me he'd like to be woken up by a blowjob... ...so I put my dick in his mouth to wake him up."

"My cousin was Mulder on Halloween. He loves the X-Files! Oh stupid autocorrect. That should have said ""murdered"". And ""loved"", past tense."

"My 11 yo noticed my receding hairline and thought it was hilarious. Until I explained how heredity works."