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Joke of the Day

"Whenever one door closes, another opens. ..perhaps the one who built the house didn't do a good job."

Next Joke
 
"What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination? HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYEEEEEEEEE"
"If I ever describe anything you tell me as ""crazy,"" it's really not, I just want out of your conversation prison."
"The volume of sewage burdening my local treatment works is rising excrementally."
"Netflix documentaries convinced me I should be vegan. So I did what any American would do. I bought some bacon and canceled Netflix."
"What do you call a person with.. A phone."
"What do you call a women with two brain cells? Pregnant."
"Management tip - only hire bald guys. They don't have anything going on besides work."
"Waiter: I'm sorry I spilled a glass of water on you. Diner: That's all right. My suit is too large anyway."
"How much...? How much dick could a dik-dik lick if a dik-dik could lick dick?"