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Joke of the Day

"I hate when people say ""women should stay in the kitchen"" ...how are they supposed to clean the rest of the house?"

"Why is the government encouraging more American made vibrators? They want to increase their gross domestic products."

"""Knock, Knock!"" ""Who's there?"" ""The Pilot, let me in!"""

"If Bernie Sanders has more delegates but still gets denied by the DNC... ...that would be unpresidented."

"I'm taking my mother-in-law to the new Resident Evil movie because she's staying with me and I love subliminal messages."

"""You've lost some weight."" sounds suspiciously like ""You were a disgusting fatso before, but I was too nice to say so.""."

"Hillary Clinton and Donald trump both are in the same car, who should be the driver? The police"

"Why didn't Jesus' business break even? It wasn't making enough prophet"

"I can be a real tiger in bed. No, wait, wait... What's that animal that plays dead?"

"What's a police officers favorite console? Wii U Wii U Wii U Wii U. Edit: Gee Wilikers Batman I've got 151 upvotes yayyyyyy. :D"