14164

Joke of the Day

"""Why does stuff like this always happen to me?"" - gay passenger on Titanic"

"How can you make a witch itch? Take away her ""W."""

"If you ask me what my favorite rock band is and I'm being subjective, I'd say The Who. If I was being objective, I'd say it was The Whom."

"If I could have sex with any historical figure it would be Marie Antoinette. I hear she gives good head."

"Q: What do teddy bears like to have in their houses? A: Fur-niture."

"I used to work in a mental institution, but I kept getting blood all over my hands. *menstrual"

"Be very careful if you eat mushrooms in the wild. There's not mushroom for error."

"Why was the chef fired? He was caught stroganoff"

"Rob thank god you picked up! Hey remember when you said if I needed a place to crash I cou- hold on *to copilot* STOP CRYING, ROB WILL HELP"

"I wouldn't last 5 minutes in prison what with my milky skin and Glee themed tattoos."