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Joke of the Day

"A ram walks into a whorehouse ""Can I get a woman?"" ""No, fuck ewe."""

"Misanthropy I joined the local misanthropes society but none of the other members like me."

"What was Whitney Houston's biggest hit? Her last one"

"What they say: ""Wow, you're really photogenic."" What they mean: ""Wow, this looks nothing like how ugly you actually are."""

"What do you call a deer with no eyes? I have no eye deer. What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs. I still have no eye deer."

"If you had to choose between voting for Trump or getting into the water with sharks, would you dive in or do a cannon ball?"

"The past, present, and future walked into a bar... It was tense."

"How is being a Jew like eating a burrito? It's really not a problem until they give you gas."

"I haven't cleaned my car in so long that I still have paper maps in my glovebox"

"""The 1st Amendment is a magical shield that protects you from any consequences after publically posting your opinions online."" - idiots"