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Joke of the Day

"me: well I grew up without a dad and I turned out okay cw: don't u collect human teeth?? me: yeah but they're not my teeth"

"If there was award for laziness... . I would send someone else to get it."

"Somewhere there's a sheep named LL Wool J. & that's what keeps me going you guys."

"Refugees do the jobs no one wants to do. Like being a suicide bomber."

"I didn't use to like fungus but then it grew on me"

"A black guy and a white guy were playing basketball in a jail. The black guy won. Do you want to know why? The black guy had home advantage. IM NOT A RACIST, PLS SENPAIS"

"5 minutes into watching willy wonka and the chocolate factory and I'm craving chocolate This is why I can't watch breaking bad"

"Stephen Harper's Campaign Against Trump ""Donald Trump: He's just too old"""

"From the list of things you should not be cheap about: pens, chairs, prostitutes, coffee, and dentists."

"Why did hitlers aircraft preform so badly after the invasion of russia? because they were stalin'"