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Joke of the Day

"I make rabbit tuxedos for a living. I'm a hare-dresser."

"Why is there no volume control on the microwave? Must it always wake the entire house when I'm trying to quietly nuke the last of the pizza?"

"What do you get if you cross Donald Trump with a reddit user? your mother"

"Floyd was supposed to hug his wife and fight his opponent he got them mixed up."

"The other day I saw two squirrels making noises at each other as if they were arguing. You could say they were squarreling."

"Why did the school boy need Viagra? He was having trouble getting up in the morning."

"We should bury everyone upside down so if they come back as zombies they'll dig the wrong way. It's called thinking ahead guys."

"TIFU by accidentally playing music off of my neighbors speakers. Whoops, wrong sub."

"Are you a homeless horse? Because you look unstable."

"Rihanna's new clothes. Chris Brown is in the news again. At a popular club downtown he apparently got drunk and started shouting ""I'm gonna beat Rihanna till she's gold and white""."