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Joke of the Day

"What does Shrek say when he wins a game of chess? Shrekmate."

"How to turn a dishwasher into a snow blower? Give the bitch a shovel"

"How did Harry Potter get down the hill? By walking. Jk. Rowling"

"Disney couldn't handle my awesome script. Kylo Ren was Rey's father. Finn was her brother. Chewbacca was her cousin twice removed."

"In case you're thinking about having a kid, my daughter just threw a tantrum because I wouldn't let her watch me poop."

"A horse walks into a bar. The bartender, confusing idioms with jokes, offers the horse water but cannot make it drink."

"I went to vegetarian restaurant the other day... I falafel afterwards."

"Dominos pizza delivery cars should be allowed to use sirens."

"What would Marilyn Monroe being doing if she were alive today? Clawing at the lid of her coffin."

"Your mother walks into the bar It's ""the"" bar because she's so fat she's in every bar."