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Joke of the Day

"Two antennas met on a roof. They fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent."

"FRIEND: Make sure you walk her to her car [hours later after date] HER: It's been 18 miles ME: I insist HER: But you drove both of us"

"How do you cover 12 holes with one hole? Take a flute and shove it up your ass."

"Whats green and fuzzy and can kill you if it falls from a tree? A pool table"

"According to Facebook, 78% of girls I went to high school with now own their own photography business."

"How do you catch a peculiar rabbit? Unique up on it."

"Husband catchs pregnant woman eating grass, what is it? Just pregnancy desire"

"A laugh track, but for every time my boss says ""I need this done today."""

"Man goes to the doctor because he believes he might have hemorrhoids He did and it was rather uncomfortable"

"""The more the merrier!"" usually means ""oh, you overheard us making those plans, huh?"""