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Joke of the Day

"What are eukaryotes' least favorite subject in school? Algaebra..."

"How to be a grown up at work? Always smile and replace ""fuck you"" with ""OK great"""

"I burnt my Hawaiian pizza today. I should have cooked it at Aloha temperature."

"Son: ""Mom, Dad we need to talk.... I'm a vegan"" **Mom cries running out the room Dad: Why can't you just have a normal eating disorder?"

"What do you call a deer with no eyes? I have no eye deer. (said with redneck twang)"

"What do you call memories of old Playstation? Sony-stalgia"

"Why do Jews Brag About How Great Their Children Are? Because they don't win traditional dick measuring contests."

"ME: Guess who was just promoted to be the new CEO! COWORKER: Amanda. ME: Why would you assume it's a man?"

"I want to do an essay on chronology and hand it in late... ... so the professor can say ""it's about time!"""

"I'm so tired of hearing people complain about being hung over. Just stop your wining."