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Joke of the Day

"the people who make lyric videos on youtube are the backbone of this nation"

"Why did the chicken cross the basketball court? Because he heard the ref was blowing fowls."

"I love the way the earth rotates. It really makes my day."

"If you've been unemployed for a while, update your resume to say youve been a Blockbuster manager for the last decade. HOW WOULD THEY KNOW!?"

"Why couldn't the penguin turn around in the phone booth? Because it had a spear through it's head."

"Action Dan here, so I read a book on Stockholm syndrome. I didn't like it at first but I have to finish a book I start, by the end I was really into it."

"Make sure to dress extra provocative if you ever find yourself in a 5th attempt to overturn a criminal conviction You'll definitely need that six appeal."

"Some people want Puerto Rico to become the 51st State... I say let's do it, and find two more new states. Then we'd have 53 states. A nice PRIME number... ONE NATION - INDIVISIBLE"

"Did you hear Han Solo will be running next years London Marathon? He says he reckons he'll be able to finish in less than 26 miles"

"Saw a squirrel get hit by a car earlier.Felt kinda bad,but I don't think the squirrel gave a shit that the Smart Car was totaled."