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Joke of the Day

"knock knock YOU: who's there ME: I eat mop YOU:______"

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"Two hillbillies were playing chess.."
"What noise did the dumbbells make when they were dropped? ... Dong-Ding."
"That if you love them set them free thing, what if they all come back at once"
"Did you hear about the tumblr user who wrote a play about foxes? They called it Fennec-Kin's Wake"
"At this point making fun of Lindsay Lohan feels like laughing at the underprivileged Little League team who has to play in blue jeans."
"Why do kids hate Steven Hawking? They don't like their vegetables."
"How do you drown a blonde? Stick a scratch and sniff to the bottom of a pool."
"Text REDCROSS to a girl and be like"" oops wrong number, I was trying to donate for the 5th time today"" then she'll sex you guaranteed."
"Just turned a corner and bumped into a woman with drawn-on eyebrows. I'm not sure which of us was more surprised."