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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes I get shivers in my spine just thinking about how much tougher Popeye would've been if he'd eaten fresh spinach instead of canned."

"Why do Japanese people look so serious in pictures? Last time they saw a flash it destroyed their country"

"Best day to propose a girl Hey U Know Which is the best day to propose a girl.. April 1 U Know Why?? If she accept its your luck otherwise just tell April Foooooll."

"When I was younger, I was kicked out of the Boy Scouts I ate a Brownie."

"I started microfinancing my money to get better savings. It just made a lot of cents to me."

"The other day I went to the doctors office. The doctor said to me, ""You've got to stop masturbating."" I replied, ""What? Why?"" The doctor answered, ""So I can examine you."""

"The fun way to tell if a celebrity is crazy is by how many times they delete and reactivate their Twitter account."

"How are one night stands like savings accounts? ...you make a deposit, withdrawal, then lose interest."

"A guy runs into a bar at light speed and asks the bartender for whatever's on tap. Thirty seconds later, the bartender asks he wants to drink."

"What's green and smells like pork? Kermit the frogs middle finger"