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Joke of the Day

"Don't make fun of a fat girl with a lisp. I'm sure she's thick and tired of it."

"I got off at the wrong bus stop. She was so hot I didn't even see the policeman."

"Quiz time Folks: The Bangles sang a song called, Walk Like an: A) gyptian B) gyptian C) gyptian D) gyptian E) gyptian."

"My boys cleaned out my car and now my change is missing. Little do they know, it costs exactly $3.63 to turn our wifi back on."

"How do you know you're at a gay barbecue? The hot dogs taste like ass."

"I just read a book about Bipolar Disorder. One hand I liked it and sent it to everyone I know, on the other hand I burned it and my house down."

"Right before I left the house my wife asked me if I filled out my organ donor information and now I'm hesitant to start the car."

"What do you call a productive Asian? China get something done."

"My lesbian neighbors asked me what I wanted for Chirstmas and I got a Rolex. I guess they miss-understood when I said ""I wanna watch""."

"Wearing Crocs is like getting a blow job from a dude... It feels really good until you look down, and realize how gay you are. Edit: Adam Carolla apparently wrote this. Who knew?"