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Joke of the Day

"The easiest way to find out if a movie is on Netflix is to simply ask yourself ""do I want to see it?"" If you do, it's not on Netflix."

"Why is India surprised by the Brexit vote? They didn't know you could get Britain to leave by voting."

"My talking dog gave me a stick the other day and told me he found it 600 miles away. That's a bit far-fetched."

"What's your best math/science pick up line?"

"[goes back in time to murder baby Hitler] wow long line of people here to kill him [goes back to murder myself] how is this line even longer"

"How do programmers like their snacks? Byte-sized."

"Why did the girl loaf of stale bread slap the boy loaf of stale bread? Because he tried to get fresh."

"So, Pee Wee Herman announced he has converted to Islam He's currently planning a pilgrimage to Mecca Lecca Hi Mecca Hiney Ho."

"A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar... ...and the bartender looks at them and says, ""What is this, a joke?"""

"Why do most men not like aspirin? Because it's a cox blocker"