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Joke of the Day
"Last chance to use the washroom before I shower! Speak now or forever hold your pees."
Next Joke
"An employee and her boss are having sex. Boss: Do you want to change positions? Employee: Uh yeah. Can I be the Assistant Manager?"
"Dog in a Bar A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: ""I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."""
"How many software engineers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, that's a hardware problem."
"A penny saved is a penny that will sit around in a jar for five years ;)"
"Stay out of my dreams if you're not going to be there when I open my eyes"
"My girlfriend keeps telling me i need a job... I said ""with your hands or your mouth?"""
"""I love all quilts, regardless of quality."" - blanket statement"
"If I have 5 apples and I give you 2 of them, just take the other 3 cause I'm going out for tacos"
"He: ""I'll catch a grenade for you."" She: ""Prove it."" He: *Plays Call of Duty*"