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Joke of the Day

"Never bring a knife to a gunfight. Bring one of those long grabber sticks so you can take the other guy's gun away."

"Thinking ab including nude photos of me in my Tinder profile to weed out women who vomit easily"

"What did the hippie say when he was kicked off the couch? Namaste"

"You've failed history again ! Well you always told me to let bygones be bygones !"

"What do you call something that you do to your self with one hand? A Selfie!"

"Did you hear they're making a holistic version of Star Wars? It's based on darth vadar's holistic brother, Ayur Veder."

"Welcome to White Privilege 101, if you have no idea why you're here that's exactly why you're here."

"In St. Louis right now, thought this was appropriate: How many black people does it take to start a riot? -1"

"A tornado walks into a bar and orders a Hurricane. The bartender asks why he is ordering a Hurricane when he is a tornado. The tornado responds with ""I am a hurricane induced tornado""."

"Starbucks this morning looks like a scene from ""The Walking Dead."""