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Joke of the Day
"My roommate gets angry when I steal their kitchen utensils It's a whisk I'm willing to take"
Next Joke
"How do scientists freshen their breaths? Ex*spearmints*"
"A man is getting head from his wife... ...and tells her that he wants to cum in her ear. ""I'll go deaf!"" she says. ""Yeah? Well I always cum in your mouth, but you never shut the fuck up!"""
"How does Stephen Hawking have sex? Enter, backspace, enter, backspace, enter, backspace..."
"What do you throw on stage at a mouse strip club? Kraft Singles."
"The worst part about my dad having a ponytail is, whenever we go out to eat, the server automatically hands the bill to me."
"Men don't ignore us; they have selective hearing. Give them instructions for roasted turkey & they'll remember ""breast, thighs, moist & hot"""
"what did cinderella do when she got to the ball? gag..."
"Searching for porn gifs... Results be like, ""oh my go..."" ""oh my go..."" ""oh my go..."" ""oh my go..."""
"The treadmill is the only product we have that the 'The Jetsons' had, I'm very disappointed at how far behind be are."