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Joke of the Day

"how did the constipated... How did the constipated mathematician solve his problem... He just worked it out with a pencil."

"What's it called when an Asian man gives his best friend head? A bro job."

"Schrodinger's Hater gonna both hate and not hate."

"How big would jupiter be if it was as close to the earth as the moon..... Pretty damn big (courtesy of my daughter)"

"Everybody is somebody else's weirdo."

"For years I thought hitchhikers were complimenting my driving."

"I'm not saying I'm a bad cook. But how long does pasta stay in the toaster?"

"I joked about a robot uprising until I waved at an automatic paper towel dispenser and nothing happened. THEY'RE EVOLVING INTO PRETTY GIRLS!"

"What do cats eat in the summer? Mice cream.. ba dum dum tsst!"

"72 virgins This was it. The suicide bomber was going to blow up the US camp. Little did he know that when he woke up he would be surrounded by 72 engineering students...."