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Joke of the Day
"Why can't white girls finish their sentences? Because they can't even"
Next Joke
"sometimes i remember i was part of the nsa hack back in spring / that all my data is currently floating around china and i'm like ""cool"""
"Three nuns are sitting on a park bench... ...when a man in a trenchcoat walks up and flashes them. The first nun has a stroke. The second nun has a stroke. The third nun couldn't reach."
"Soon be Christmas... WHO SAYS doing Christmas shopping early avoids the crush? Last year, I did mine a full 12 months in advance, and the shops were just as busy as ever."
"[giving mother in law my famous salad dressing recipe over the phone] 1 part vinegar, then *bites lip so I don't laugh* 2 parts baking soda"
"What do you call a bar in Star Wars? A space bar."
"Divorce.... Is the fucking you get for the fucking you got!"
"The powerball 1.3 billion dollars"
"With women it's not about how much money you make, what you drive or where you live at... LOL Who am I kidding, even the homeless women go after the homeless guys with the most stuff.."
"Yar, I wound up a toy car and put it down me pants. It's driving me nuts."