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Joke of the Day
"Current fitness level: arm is tired from brushing teeth."
Next Joke
"Someone tried to touch my ass without my permission. Safe to say, I'm not letting anyone on my farm again."
"*knocks over the 17 Starbucks cups on her nightstand *answers her alarm clock, ""hello?"""
"Why do the French like Cheap Trick? Because they always surrender!"
"What did the pirate say when he turned 80? Aye matey"
"What is one thing that I would never give? I don't give a rat's ass!"
"What do you call a Mexican baptism? Bean dip."
"What fruits do vampires eat? Blood oranges."
"Harry was blind. His friends bought him a silver-coated nutmeg grater. When they asked how he liked it, he said it was the most violent story he'd ever read."
"A blind walks into a bar He said ""Aw!"""