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Joke of the Day

"Well, it's easy to tell I'm married. It's Friday night and I'm at home updating my facebook status..."

"I've been on reddit so much I'm gravely ill now... I think I caught a computer virus."

"I asked my waitress if she thought me eating alone was embarrassing and she said, ""I work at Cheesecake Factory"""

"The good thing about being tall is, you can't get lost in a crowd. The bad thing is, you can't get lost in a crowd."

"Whenever I get to a restaurant and they say there is a wait I say ""do you know who I am?"" because while I wait I like to be introspective"

"What do you call 2 Mexicans in a boat with a case of beer? A pinat"

"Whats your name? Whats the color of the sky?... Me: whats your name? You:(insert name) Me:whats the color of the sky? You:blue Me:whats my name? Now put it all together."

"All the jokes about iPhone 6S are just slightly improved jokes about iPhone 6."

"Why does SnoopDogg always carry an umbrella? Fo Drizzle"

"If your smartphone is wet.. .. put it into a bottle of rice. The rice will then attract asians who will repair it."