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Joke of the Day

"I'm proud of this groaner, even if it gets downvoted more than a duck winning an election."

"What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? It's dangerous to hit a lightbulb with a bat."

"Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana."

"You would never be able to live down to your reputation, but I see you're doing your best."

"I've suffered from identity crisis since I was a little boy. I mean girl."

"What do you get when you drop an egg off the Empire State Building? New Yolk"

"Yelp Review: Babies Cute at first, but then screamy like angry pterodactyls. There is literally poop everywhere. Would not recommend."

"I smiled and waved at my neighbour so I bet the first thing he'll do today is buy bedroom curtains."

"I called out my wife's name during sex and she walked in to see what I needed. Won't do that again."

"What if... ...the U.S. government builds a wall to keep the Americans in?"