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Joke of the Day
"Why does Richard have a small dick? Because Dick is short for Richard."
Next Joke
"The joke that made me subscribe to this subreddit: I love being bipolar. It sucks."
"I could be wearing a onesie right now, you don't know."
"What do you get when you push a piano out of the second floor window of an elementary school? A flat minor."
"Q: How many Scorpios does it take to change a lightbulb? A: So who wants to know? Why do *you* want to know? Are you a cop?"
"What's the last thing a Redneck says before he dies? Watch this!"
"How do you get an elephant on a train? You take the ""S"" out of sub, and the ""F"" out of way. [Say it out loud]"
"""Sorry I'm late, but let me explain."" -The inventor of the snooze button at the initial presentation"
"When I die, I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. ... ... not screaming in terror like his passengers."
"Crocodiles; these prehistoric beasts can grow up to 20 feet! Although most just grow 4."