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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a bag of tiny crosses? Jesus Pieces."
Next Joke
"How to sports: - Take a ball - Put it someplace someone else doesn't want you to put it - Congratulations you've now sportsed"
"Explaining a joke is like dissecting a frog... You know more about it, but now the frog is dead."
"[first date] -so how do you feel about octopus? Her: I like em -Whew! [lets other six arms fall out of shirt]"
"What's the difference between a laundry machine and a girl? The washing machine doesn't get upset if I dump a load in it and never call back"
"My dog never listens to me, and I think he might have a speech impediment... He keeps balking at me when I try to tell him to be quiet"
"A reposted joke walks into a bar... It gets downvoted into submission"
"Still good at casually flexing my bicep the second before a girl touches it."
"Daughter just told me, ""Dad, I don't make sandwiches, I eat sandwiches."" One day her picture will be on money."
"Why don't old ladies receive orals sex? Have you ever tried pulling apart a grilled cheese sandwich?"