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Joke of the Day

"Apple vs Windows If apple made a car would it have windows?"

"Gotta hand it to midgets sometimes. You know, cause they can't reach and all."

"DOCTOR: u broke ur leg in five places, how did this happen ME:*flashback of me trying to carry too much ice cream up the stairs* bears."

"If you're able to roll over in your grave, you should save that energy for yelling and digging."

"What do you find at the end of a double rainbow? A group of gay men"

"eer booze and fun!' 'WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible."

"Ebola causes headaches, feelings of nausea and is very difficult to get rid of. Is it a virus or a free U2 album?"

"I would give my dad what he really wants on Father's Day, but I can't afford to move out yet."

"I am under: paid, pressure, followed, rated, the gun, the radar, the influence, the weather and the wrong impression."

"I wonder if Ninja-Siri wields Cortanas."