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Joke of the Day

"My New Years resolution is to quit doing dick jokes. It does limit my material though. It does makes it...hard."

"Anti-jokes Does anyone have any good anti-jokes? I'll go first! Q:What's sad about four black men in a Cadillac driving off of a cliff? A:*They were my friends.*"

"What do you call a midget with Down's Syndrome who arrives to class late? A little tardy."

"I miss you... then I eat something and it goes away..."

"Kids, don't grow up... it's a trap!"

"So sick of musicians telling lovers in songs that they'd give them stuff if they only had it to give. That's too easy, assholes."

"Egg puns pls Thought this was an eggcellent idea..."

"What's the difference between a mosque and a school? I don't know, I just fly the drones."

"me: it's too hot *opens window* *in comes 305430 flies, 43866 spiders, 91193 moths, a serial killer, a paedophile and a burglar* (HELP)"

"""You miss 100% of the shots you don't take."" -Lee Harvey Oswald"