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Joke of the Day
"Every cab ride for me is 75% fake laughter."
Next Joke
"I told my wife to embrace her mistakes. She cried & then she hugged me."
"How do you get Martha Stewart to scream twice? Fuck her in the ass, then wipe your dick on the curtains."
"A fish swam into a wall... and said ""dam!"""
"I went to Africa to help with the Ebola crisis. When I left, my mentor said thanks and told me that all of Africa was behind me. I instinctively reached for my wallet."
"What does a prostitute ask a man with his mouthful? Come again?"
"When you're alone in your room, start doing karate so ghosts know what's up."
"What if the #skywire guy starts doing Gangnam Style??"
"The part of the Harry Potter movies that I found most unbelievable was that mostly unsupervised teenagers never had wild keg parties."
"What do the morbidly obese and podophiliacs have in common? [NSFW] They can only get off with their feet."