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Joke of the Day

"[signing birth certificate] wife: you put Owen, right? me: yup nurse: Now we'll just need a footprint from little [reading] ""Owned"""

"What is a pirate's favorite letter? ""R?"" ""Aye, ye would think so but 'tis the C he loves!"""

"9 guys walk into a gay bar... They don't come out."

"So, I was talking to my friend who runs a scrap yard. I asked how business was... ... He replied: ""pretty good, I've seen a bit of a pickup recently."""

"What did the italian man with dementia have for dinner? Forgetti Bolognese."

"What is a Jamaicans favorite country to visit? Yeahman"

"What did the sign say at a strip club Business doing pleasure for you"

"Did you hear about the murder mystery porno? In the end, everyone did it."

"Bernie Sanders was going to do a parody of Trump's slogan for his campaign but ""Make America Bern Again"" didn't go over well with marketing."

"How many pallbearers are needed at an Indian funeral? 2, it only takes two people to carry a trash-can."