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Joke of the Day

"I named my hard drive That Thang, so once a month my computer asks me if I want to Back That Thang Up."

"How long after walking into someone's house is it acceptable to ask for their WiFi password?"

"Two fish are in a tank... One is driving, and the other is manning the guns."

"Q: Did you hear about the bulimic bachelor party? A: The cake came out of the girl."

"[sits family down at dinner table] I've decided we're going to start watching anime"

"""It meant nothing to me, babe. I swear!"" When my girl catches me in the closet eating Devil's food cake with my bare hands."

"American Apparel has really cornered the market on the modern, independent date rape victim."

"What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, and is on fire? Bernie."

"Black Guy shot 15 times by the Alabama Police Worst case of suicide they had ever seen."

"All I do all day is roll massive joints and deal with huge quantities of dope. Being a pipe inspector sucks."