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Joke of the Day

"My sister is gifting me some rain forest this Christmas... Is it possible to hire some local loggers or will I have to travel to Brazil and cut it down myself?"

"Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! -Librarians arguing"

"What do you call a black woman who's had 4 abortions? A crime fighter."

"Do not tell a kid you didn't understand his joke unless you have 4 hours free to hear the explanation."

"Just walked into my local court house, they were all sitting around in a circle with black candles and robes trying to summon a jury #funny"

"I was sold a calculator with the plus button missing. Something doesn't quite add up."

"Tear drop tattoos should only be for people with a lazy eye so we know which one to look at."

"Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He pasta-way"

"Go 3 days without your favorite thing. Then go 3 days without sleep. It turns out sleep is actually your favorite thing."

"Throwing acid is wrong. In some people's eyes."