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Joke of the Day
"What did one Melon say to the other after it was asked marry it? We Can't Alope"
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"Sticking a $5 bill into a vending machine turns it into my grandmother, dispensing stale snacks and rare dollar coins."
"Nana's house is getting real bad, you can't swing a dead cat without hitting another dead cat."
"Give a man a fish & he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish & he'll plan fishing trips with his buddies to escape from his annoying wife."
"How does a plant walk? It uses a plant stand."
"[Sexting] ""So, what are you wearing?"" A nice blouse and a light sweater. Sensible shoes."
"Growing up, I had a best friend. When we first met we didn't see eye to eye, but then he grew on me."
"[breakfast in hell] STALIN: Toast is burnt POL POT: Eggs are rotten HITLER: I hate the juice STALIN: Oh here we go HITLER: I said JUICE"
"What type of person does cocaine after taking a shot? A linebacker I came up with this on the toilet... Hope it's not old."
"Ebay is challenging to use . . . (x-post from F7U14) I searched for lighters, and I got 72,816 matches!"