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Joke of the Day

"I hate it when people call me four letter words like innumerate."

"If you're ever feeling down about yourself, head to your local GameStop and ask the workers how they feel about dragons."

"Christians call it the Rapture. Chuck norris calls it cleaning his house."

"I've Got a Surprise for you! says the excited girl friend. ""abort it"" he reply's."

"Everyone in my house has diarrhea I guess it runs in the family"

"How does Davy Crockett like his pie? Alamo'd"

"What do you call a gay vegetarian? A vegetarian."

"Plastic silverware: because the only thing I hate more than poisoning the environment is washing dishes."

"Tiger Woods: He puts the semen in product endorsements. And women. I mean he used to. Crap, can I start over? I've almost got this."

"They say swearing is due to limited vocabulary. I know thousands of words, but I still prefer' f*ck off' to go away'."