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Joke of the Day

"How do you get to Nazi Germany It's on the third right EDIT: Woah this is like my third day here front page? I feel special now."

"What did the unused dough say to the baker? Why don't you knead me?"

"No one has ever said, ""You know what would make this even better? Turkey bacon."""

"Fox News: Trump looks strong! CNN: Hillary should get the win! MSNBC: If you put a buncha hot dogs in a hamburger bun, is that a sandwich???"

"If someone finds a corpse, in the river off 4th St., in a blue suitcase, it wasn't me."

"Facebook should have a I Don't Give a Shit option next to the Also Block iRL option next to the Would u Like to Send a Nuclear Bomb option."

"[at zoo] Kids, here we have reptiles. Reptiles are cold-blooded. This means they rely on external heat and often answer texts with just a K."

"Barack Obama is having a race with Joe Biden around the white house. After finishing the race Obama says ""Whew, just under 10 minutes. Did I break the record?"" Biden replies ""No, Bush did 9:11."""

"(original) I just got my flu shot and tried to draw something, but it still looks shitty. I thought it was supposed to make me artistic?"

"What'd the Mexican say when he was upset? I don't want to taco bout it."