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Joke of the Day

"Liverpool sounds like the most disgusting place in the world to hold a swim meet."

"Virginity is like a soapbubble, one prick and it is gone."

"Wash the alligator clips with rubbing alcohol during flu season Protect yourself from catching a terminal illness."

"What do you call a seagull that catches you sleeping? A baegull."

"I love heavy metal. My favourite is lead."

"The bassist walked past the bar."

"A woman at work got really angry with me when I... Politely held the door open for her. She must've been a feminist cos she got real mad and shouted at me ""Do you mind I'm trying to take a shit! """

"Girls think shrinkage is funny but I just think they're jealous, because the same principal does not apply to them."

"What does school and the male reproductive organ have in common? Most of the time it's hard and long - unless you're Asian."

"I Have plenty of girls who can suck, I'm looking for the one who can blow my mind."