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Joke of the Day

"A woman ran out of toothpicks... Woman: Nanny! Why do we always ran out of toothpicks? Nanny: I don't know maam. I always return it after using."

"My son would have been 16 today... It's too bad he died after being caught in my wife's bed."

"I told my husband I'm pregnant. He said ""Hi Pregnant, I'm Dad!"""

"What do sex in a canoe and American beer have in common? They're both fucking close to water."

"What's the difference between Ray Rice's wife and a fish? A fish can take a left hook."

"I'm the hier to the Tampax fortune Soon I'll have more blood money than African warlords."

"A waffle is just a more considerate pancake. It's like, here, let me hold that syrup for you in these convenient boxes."

"When I go to someone's house & they tell me to make myself at home, the first thing I do is throw them out because I don't like visitors"

"Did you hear the score of the Germany Vs Ethiopia game? Germany 8, Ethiopia didn't."

"What do you get with breaking news? News casts"