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Joke of the Day

"My chess board grew a tumor Thankfully it's B-9"

"Describe yourself in 3 words: 1. Lazy"

"Technically, a bus driver is anyone who drives a bus, Officer."

"There's a bird in the yard and she's shaking her tail feathers in hope of attracting a mate. HE SHOULD LOVE YOU FOR YOUR BRAIN, I yell."

"House Painter I was a house painter for five years, I never thought I was going to get that house painted."

"BANGkok Too soon?"

"What does a Kentucky girl scream while she is having sex? Get off me Pa, you is crushing my cigarettes!"

"Why do women close their eyes during sex? Because they can't stand to see a man happy."

"Be glad that Hitler existed. Think about all of the Jew jokes we would have missed without him!"

"I was an unpopular child I got beat up a lot at school, but even though my teachers couldn't stop the beatings, they did give me a gym credit for them."