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Joke of the Day

"LPT: How to tie an extremely difficult knot Just put it in your pocket. Works like a charm with my headphones every time."

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"Why are Twitter jokes not as funny when you read them aloud to a friend? It's not like they had to be there..."
"What does tofu have in common with a Dildo? They are both meat substitutes."
"No matter the medium, a well done burger joke is rare"
"Today was so terrible, I thought Steven Seagal was in it."
"Cop- Do you have any drugs in the vehicle? -No, go fish."
"""This website requires Java"" *gets cup of coffee* ""This website requires Java"" *looks at coffee* *throws coffee at monitor*"
"What would you call Scott Adsit if he was a skirt? Scott Ad**skirt**"
"Did you hear about the wooden car? Wooden move"
"Arguing with autocorrect is the new yelling at the television."