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Joke of the Day
"I'm fairly certain that most of us are one full gas tank away from bankruptcy."
Next Joke
"Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory."
"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl use the bathroom? The ""p"" is silent."
"What's the opposite of marshmellow? Well, I guess it would be marshmadness"
"Please donate to my gofundme to replace the laptop i threw across the room in anger after my last gofundme failed"
"*works out for 75 mins *eats an entire batch of cookie dough"
"Give a man a fish Feed him for a day. Give a man a poisoned fish, feed him for the rest of his life."
"Director: so, you'll be playing this regular guy... Johnny Depp: no thanks."
"Finish this sentence: I like my coffee like I like my _____. I like my coffee like I like my coffee: recursive."
"What do spam emails and porn have in common? They both make me insecure about my penis."