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Joke of the Day

"I just now realized the guy at the urinal that complemented my watch might not have actually just been looking at my watch."

"Who are some of the best readers in the world? World Trade Center workers, some of them can read 50 stories in just 8 seconds!"

"Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home"

"What's green, fuzzy and could kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table"

"Why can't Ray Charles see his friends? Because he is married"

"What is a pirate's favorite fast food joint? Aaaaarby"

"I accidently pooped myself in the elevator. I'm taking this shit to a whole new level."

"I now determine the days of the week based on Twitter. Is it Follow Friday yet?"

"Toilet humour isn't funny It's just crap."

"Why are female golfers better than male golfers? Because they swing both ways"