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Joke of the Day
"I'm torn on what i really think about masturbation. on one hand it feels good."
Next Joke
"Today is full of possibilities and I have a strong feeling none of them are mine."
"Chuck Norris doesn't have hairy balls because hair does not grow on steel."
"Staying at a hotel tonight which means I get to play everyone's favorite game: Are you smarter than a new shower?"
"I remember when [person x] was just *this* big (hold hand at knee level)... Then as I got closer I realized it was a matter of perspective."
"-I'm just gonna have 1 drink before dinner -I'm just gonna have 1 drink with dinner -I'm just gnna hav 1 aftdinr drk -I pishd ma pnts gen"
"How do you find and old man in the dark? Just feel around. It's not hard."
"Yesterday my Korean friend died... He was So Yung"
"We come to love not by finding a perfect person... but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."
"What is Harry potters favorite way to get down a hill? Walking....J.K . Rowling"