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Joke of the Day
"Use conditioner... Shampoo burns (;"
Next Joke
"The most positive subreddit award goes to... /r/hiv"
"I murder drifters and use their hair to make little dolls. Oh, you meant at work! My biggest weakness is that I'm a perfectionist.'"
"Living in Switzerland wouldn't be so bad. The flag is a plus."
"A jumper cable walks into a bar The bartender says, ""Sure, you can stay, but don't start anything!"""
"OUR KID WAS SOAKING WET WHEN YOU BROUGHT HIM HOME FROM SCHOOL! Me: [water pouring from backseat] Listen, this car pool thing was your idea"
"[sees people filming a movie] yeah real original. a movie. like that's never been done before"
"What do you call a robotic lizard that can't stand up? Ereptile dysfunction."
"""Doctor Doctor, I have three vaginas"" Well is it causing you any problems? ""Problems!? I'm getting fucked left right and centre!"""
"Is cyanide the most efficient way to kill someone? Asking for a fiend."