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Joke of the Day

"When I was a kid... ... I asked my mum what a couple was and she said, 'Oh, two or three'. And she wonders why her marriage didn't work out."

"Just realized all my tweets are about my genitals . Time to change the subject. Do you believe in aliens ? If so , do they have genitals?"

"If only Lord Ram used Apple maps to reach Ayodhya, Beijing would have been celebrating Diwali today."

"heard this on Storage Wars A Chinese couple own a restaurant, they're in the bedroom and the husband asks if they can 69 and the wife says why you want beef and broccoli now?"

"If storks bring human babies what bring monster babies? Cranes."

"Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? greg."

"So excited! I'm taking an online grammar class. No more typos for me. Nolege is power biches!"

"Which lawyers are U2 fans? The pro bono ones"

"Gandalf gave me a test... I didn't pass."

"Me: Yeah man, got her right where I want her Bartender: Oh yeah? Me: Yup, sitting at home while the cable man works on th ::rushes home::"