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Joke of the Day

"How can you tell if the kid that stole your bike is half black and half polish? He's running down the street with the bike under his arm."

"Don't you hate when you are reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles?"

"He's what you'd call a Bukake expert... ...He's done loads of research."

"I went jogging one time why am I not thin?"

"If you give someone some Beethoven CDs for a gift and they don't like it, you can always take them Bach"

"*goes on job interview* -You come very highly recommended. -Why thank you, I always try to be as stoned as possible before I come to work."

"A slutty egg walks into a bar. Everyone starts laughing at her. ""I don't get it. What's so funny?"" she demands. The bartender says, ""Well, the yoke's on you."""

"I was watching the women's Golf earlier. They couldn't drive, but boy, can they use an iron."

"Joke: In my intro to archaeology lab, I had a pop-quiz about bones in the human body I couldn't find that humerus either"

"complaining about your wife's stories will result in having to sit through her story about the time you complained about her stories"