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Joke of the Day

"I told my paralyzed girlfriend I was leaving her... She couldn't stand to see me go..."

"Two men walk into a bar. The third one should've seen it coming."

"Why was the little strawberry sad? Her mommy was in a jam."

"I once dated a strict Catholic from the south of Ireland I'll tell you what, you can take the girl out of Cork...."

"Did you hear about the dyslexic who walked into a bra"

"Knock-knock Who's there? Howdjalikeablowjob Howdjalikeablowjob who? No, no...the proper answer is ""Why, yes! Thank you."""

"My cat sits on my lap while I use the bathroom She cuddles the shit out of me."

"Republicans: Don't let Syrians in! Trump: Don't let ANY Muslims in! Republicans: TOO FAR (dude be cool, we've got an election to win)"

"Where do you find a zebra? 25 letters after a, brah."

"I just paid to have my house exorcised... But I couldn't keep up with the repayments - so my house got Repossessed."