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Joke of the Day

"The guy blaring the self help CD at the red light in the rusted car with no bumpers wasn't amused when I said, ""I don't think it's working"""

"What do nine out of ten people enjoy? A gangbang."

"Believe in yourself. Build a religion around yourself. Canonize your quotidian tasks. Build idols of yourself in your best outfits."

"What do you call a drug dealers phone book? -An addictionary."

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Doesn't matter how many of them come, they can't change a thing."

"Why do Women rub their eyes when they wake up? (NSFW) A: They don't have balls to scratch!!"

"Why shouldn't you wear Ukrainian underwear? Chernobyl fall out"

"My clothes were traumatically stolen from me. But I've recovered."

"Getting hit by a sound wave a couple of times won't affect you. Increase the frequency however... And it hertz"

"My housemate told me to get something to the front page of reddit I should just recycle... It'll take a lot more than that to get me to take the bins out!"